I ask that question in the subject, because it really doesn’t actually do very much to me.
I don’t really get the point of the opening (“Hello Mr Anthony Attwood”). “Dear Tony” does indeed make me think this might be from a friend or a company we have dealt with before, or indeed a reader of this news service. So that does draw me in.
But then, with those “Dear Tony” letters and emails which are just sales chit chat, I get rather annoyed because I have been tricked.
And as for “Dear Anthony” that doesn’t work because no one calls me Anthony although it is my full name. And “Hello Mr Anthony Attwood”… well, it just falls dead flat.
The rest of the piece goes down hill from this point on. If you have been reading the series on the DMS news group (also reproduced on www.blog.hamilton-house.com) you’ll know that I really do think we need to grab the reader and excite the reader. Does this do it? Not for me.
I have taken out the sender’s name to avoid any thought that I am attacking a single company. I am not – emails like this arrive every day. Meanwhile if you want to know more about how we would do this, call 01536 399 000, or take a look at www.hamilton-house.com which has a review of our services.
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Hello Mr Anthony Attwood
My name is xxxxxx xxxxxxxx, and I run a company called xxxxxxxx xxx xxxxxxxx in Milton Keynes. For many years we have created software systems for businesses in this area, and we have created some very exciting programs which I would like you to know about.
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Hamilton House Mailings Ltd reg number 2444392 VAT 354907535GB. Phone 01536 399 000.